I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I am one with the molecules
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
