Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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