Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
