It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize