I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize