I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
