love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
