i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize