Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
