i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize