just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Randomize
