Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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