My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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