can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
