she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
babies were throwing up all over the place
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
