I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
