it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
