their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
My penis needs a shock collar
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
