the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Bring me that man meat
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
