dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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