oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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