Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
