then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
