Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
