My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
