So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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