so that wasnt chicken after all
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Randomize