yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
