I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
