We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
