I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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