I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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