feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
