its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
