So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
