is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
