The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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