I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
