I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Randomize
