i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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