i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
