she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
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Do I have a choice?
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I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
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