shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
