So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
