it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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