Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Randomize