sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
