4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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