Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize