Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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