So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
