so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Randomize